Friday, April 12, 2013

Bullying from one parent to another

Bullying from one parent to another
The word “bully" is as prevalent as the words” I love you"

Daily our children go to school and are subjected to the values and parenting styles that differ from you as a parent. Differences in family values often spark bullying. The steps to assist our children are not victims of bullying vary, but I offer a few as a parent.
  A Parent's Guiding Steps
1.  Create a routine: Each day ask your child about their day and truly wait and listen to their responses and how they share the information with you (really listen). This will allow you to know when something different and you may learn a lot about your children from regularly asking that question.  In fact, if becomes bonding time.

2. Writing it down: On the contrary, if you want you can ask your child to write down what happened during their day and encourage them not to leave anything out. This helps your child recall the events that led up to the bullying; it also helps them go to their teacher when it happens, instead of waiting and holding it in until they see you.

3. Investigate and Observe: After your child has told you about an incident at school, i.e. ... That a child  keeps calling him / her names or insists on pushing them to the back of the line and laughing about it to all the other children in the class -- what can you do?

-- arrange  to make a trip to your child's school and work with the school officials to be able to observe the inner- workings of the class room ( you'll be able to see very quickly who has the power; either the teacher or a specific child). After being an observer in the classroom, schedule a conference. Alert your child of the process.

4. Schedule a formal meeting: The first formal meeting should be an informative meeting to let the teacher and principal know that your child has told you about another child calling him/ her names and pushing him/ her to the end of the line and the other kids laughing. You are probably thinking to yourself, “Why have meetings with both the principal and the teacher?" This helps everyone be aware of the situation and monitor what's going on in the classroom as well as other classrooms that your child may attend throughout the day - music, art and P.E.

5. Tell your child you trust them: Most important- let your child know that you are on their side and you believe him/her. Explain that bullying is unacceptable from others, as well as from them. Lastly be active in demanding change for your child's environment.

By: Cara Burrus

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